Christmas is Different This Year

Well, it's been so long since I last blogged, I couldn't remember my login or my password!! It took a few tries to sign on. Now, that's sad!

I've been thinking since Thanksgiving about how different this Christmas will be. A sad feeling comes over me which makes me feel guilty. There's a lack of motivation to get ready for Christmas this year because it just won't be the same. This year only Josh and Caleb will be home....well, we hope Josh will be home. (He just started a new job and doesn't know if he will get to come. I'm in favor of quiting the job if he can't. It's just a job while in college!) Our oldest son Shane who lives in Florida with his wife, DeAnna, and son Seth, will not be coming home (also due to new job and no vacation time) and Charity and Marc, Cerys and Bailey will not be home this year. Christmas is a time for family and the joy we have when the house is full of kids and laughter and food. Christmas is the most fun when the little ones are here. Our heart breaks to not be with our grandkids at this time of year.

We normally put up the tree at Thanksgiving. Randy, Marc, Josh and Caleb have hung the lights outside for the last 10 years. The whole house is usually decorated. It's my favorite time of year and I love lots of decorations. This year we finally put the tree up a few days ago. No lights went up outside - Caleb can't do it alone and Randy can longer get up on the roof. No other decorations have been put inside, just the tree. It just doesn't seem exciting with a only 16 yr old and 19 yr old for Christmas day. They are more interested in sleeping and texting. Well, they do still want to wake up to Monkey Bread.

I read Charity's blog this morning and I cried. She worded it so much more beautifully than I could have...about Christmas not being what we want it to be. She put it into perspective and I love how she identified with Mary. Charity helped me see that I have lost the reason behind Christmas and my emphasis needs to be redirected. Yes, Christmas will not be what it has always been in the past, but instead of being sad and depressed about it, today I will finish the decorating (even though Christmas is just a few days away), I will cook the candies and cookies for whoever is here, I will play the Christmas music and be happy. I will be grateful for the opportunity to celebrate Jesus' birth, enjoy the 2 kids that will be here and look forward to a new chapter of memories of a different Christmas....and I'll still make the monkey bread.